Powdered Milk and Head Lice

Powdered Milk and Head Lice

The last day I was beautiful
I forgot the rules and walked across the grass with the 'do not walk' sign
Reflecting light so bright I couldn't see

The last year I was beautiful
I started smoking cigarettes at dawn and told my mother what I really thought
About powdered milk and head lice and removed the bars of soap
From all the bathrooms so I could swear

The last time I was beautiful
I stopped pretending that I liked
Tidy drawers and I wore socks instead
That didn’t match and underwear with holes
So they’d all be shocked when I wrecked my marriage
Instead of my car

And all the holy congregation of Brothers Righteous and Sisters Uptight
Gasped and gossiped and crawled away from me like slugs
Hiding themselves under rocks that were the shattered Ten Commandments
I laughed out loud at my own funeral to celebrate my death
I danced naked on my grave of should and shouldn’t
And sinful and imperfect

The last time I was beautiful ended and began with the moment
I stuck a pin in the illusion and released the hot air
Which escaped with a hiss and a backward movement
Out of control around the room that was made
With lines I’d already colored outside of

Ingrid Kincaid / August 2014
I wrote this to honor the courage it took for me to leave, the religion, the marriage, the lie.